Light my fire – Keeping romance alive while trying to get pregnant
This time of year, thoughts turn to romance, but the fire may be dying if you’re trying to get pregnant. Especially for couples going through infertility treatment, it can be a time of frustration, stress and miscommunication.
Not only do couples feel isolated, often facing constant questions from friends and family, they may find themselves in conflict with each other.
Instead of looking at your partner as your Valentine, you may be avoiding being close. Research shows that during fertility treatments:
- Men want to “fix” the problem. Woman may view this “solution” approach as a sign that their husbands/partners are not listening to them.
- 50% to 60% of couples report significant decreases in sexual satisfaction, and this can decline as treatment continues.
- Women are often plagued by negative thoughts about themselves during intimacy.
- 20% to 30% of men report episodes of sexual dysfunction.
- How can you keep the fires of romance burning? Remember you are on the same team! Try this:
- Learn to really listen and not interrupt when your partner is trying to talk to you.
- Take “fertility breaks,” special times when you enjoy each other and talk about anything other than fertility. Heal, and re-bond.
- Separate baby-making from love-making. Remember, you are only fertile a couple of days a month. On the other non-fertile days, try to remember what you used to do when intimacy was fun – be creative! If you have to, use one bedroom for procreation and another room for recreation. It’s better to keep the two separate!
- Keep remembering that your dream is still alive.. and someday, somehow, you will find a way to become a parent!
Share your comments, what happens to romance while trying to get pregnant?